Everybody is leaving.
The wonderful technician in my postdoc lab left a few weeks ago to start grad school. I'm happy for him to start the new phase in his life, and I think he will be a very successful student. At the same time, I was so sorry to see him go. He was my scientific buddy in the lab, as our interests were more similar than to the other lab members. We also got along very well personally. Fortunately, I think we'll stay in touch, and might even have opportunities to collaborate while he's in school.
The other postdoc in my postdoc lab is also about to leave. She found a full time position in industry after just short of a year in her postdoc. I think the new job will be a great match for her, but we'll be fucked without her skill set around (PI will replace her, but he has made no moves to do so yet). In addition, she breathes life into the social atmosphere of the lab, so things will be a lot more dry after she's gone. On the other hand, she tends to be a bit of a drama queen and I don't think I'll miss that component of her personality so much.
Lastly and most disappointing, Awesome Technician is leaving. I'm devastated and so is Research Advisor. I'll be lucky if I ever work with someone as competent, nice, consistent, positive, and non-judgmental as her again. It's going to have a huge impact on the productivity of RA's lab. She is leaving for a better compensated position in an area she has wanted to get into for a long time so I am happy for her even if I'm super sad to see her go.
Time marches on.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Monday, September 6, 2010
Mantra
Most of you have probably read Ambivalent Academic's terrific post for Samia's excellent zomg grad school!!!1 carnival. My favorite part of the post was her recommendation to have a mantra. I had a mantra in my pre- and early grad school days, which was "Take care of it!" but it was usually directed at someone else rather than used to motivate myself. In contrast, I had a motivating mantra for grad school, and now I have a different one for my postdoc.
The grad school mantra was "you're a Good Scientist". It came up one day with my science best friend (SBF), a colleague from an institution in another state who was visiting to learn a lab technique. We started saying things like, "a Good Scientist would stay and finish this" or "you're such a Good Scientist for learning that statistical analysis", or "I'm a Good Scientist, because I did everything on my list". That held over after SBF left and helped get me through my thesis writing: "a Good Scientist would write one more paragraph". Since I very much wanted to be a Good Scientist (and still do!), I would find a way to rustle up some more concentration and write another paragraph.
Now my mantra is "put on your big girl panties". I love this one, which I got from my sister-in-law. It means, "grow up! stop being a whiny baby wearing diapers, put on your big girl panties, and get it done" It means you need to do the things you are capable of doing even if you don't want to do them. I have to say this to myself a lot these days because I have to do a lot of things that are outside my comfort zone.
The grad school mantra was "you're a Good Scientist". It came up one day with my science best friend (SBF), a colleague from an institution in another state who was visiting to learn a lab technique. We started saying things like, "a Good Scientist would stay and finish this" or "you're such a Good Scientist for learning that statistical analysis", or "I'm a Good Scientist, because I did everything on my list". That held over after SBF left and helped get me through my thesis writing: "a Good Scientist would write one more paragraph". Since I very much wanted to be a Good Scientist (and still do!), I would find a way to rustle up some more concentration and write another paragraph.
Now my mantra is "put on your big girl panties". I love this one, which I got from my sister-in-law. It means, "grow up! stop being a whiny baby wearing diapers, put on your big girl panties, and get it done" It means you need to do the things you are capable of doing even if you don't want to do them. I have to say this to myself a lot these days because I have to do a lot of things that are outside my comfort zone.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Refreshing the feeds
I've been meaning to shift over from Bloglines to Reader for ages, and I finally did it today. I started out using Bloglines, and tried Reader some time after but I never really liked it. The sort-of-annoying way that Bloglines has you add feeds made me decide to finally switch. This also means I finally updated the feeds of all the blogs that moved this summer, so I can get up-to-date on all my blog-friends I've been missing. I added some new-to-me blogs too, and I might add some more soon; I've been noticing lots of new folks around in the comments of other blogs very consistently but I haven't added any blogs to my list in a long time. It was time to freshen things up, especially since the posting frequency of many of my old favorites has dropped off in the last 6-12 months. I need to update my blogroll too, and maybe change my template.
Blogging hasn't been as much fun lately as it was when I started, so maybe some changes will help get me back into it. It's never something I want to feel like I have to do, or guilty about. However, I did find it to be a great source of camaraderie and reassurance as well as a nice way to practice regular, low-pressure writing so I think it's worth it to renew my interest in it, for now.
Blogging hasn't been as much fun lately as it was when I started, so maybe some changes will help get me back into it. It's never something I want to feel like I have to do, or guilty about. However, I did find it to be a great source of camaraderie and reassurance as well as a nice way to practice regular, low-pressure writing so I think it's worth it to renew my interest in it, for now.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
One of many things I took for granted about my old advisor was how attentive she was in emails. She always answered my emails and always actually responded to what I wrote. I'm finding that is relatively rare.
It is so fucking annoying to send emails that I think are important (like when someone specifically asks for an email with certain information) and have them ignored or under-answered. Example: "do you want me to do A or B?" response: "yes". Or a message comprised of several items gets the reply "go ahead". Go ahead and charge your account? Go ahead and take the day off? Go ahead with the experiment? WTF!?
I get the feeling that people get annoyed with me for sending emails that are too long ("I can't read that much on my iphone" - gimme a break!). But I also feel like people don't have time to talk to me, so I send emails because that seems more efficient, especially when several people need to get the information simultaneously. I try to make them as streamlined as possible, with bullet points or numbered lists. Sometimes they get answered well and it's awesome, but plenty of times I get some kind of confusing bullshit. And then people complain when they feel left "out of the loop". I've also noticed that other people send the biggest piles of steaming nonsense in their emails to me, so I guess they do think I'm overdoing it. But when I can't even figure out what the point of your message is, as though you are continuing an in-person conversation that I didn't hear, I think you're doing the shitty job, not me.
End of rant, thank you.
P.S. Comments telling me that senior people get so many emails that they might just die if they have to reply to my (solicited) message are not welcome.
It is so fucking annoying to send emails that I think are important (like when someone specifically asks for an email with certain information) and have them ignored or under-answered. Example: "do you want me to do A or B?" response: "yes". Or a message comprised of several items gets the reply "go ahead". Go ahead and charge your account? Go ahead and take the day off? Go ahead with the experiment? WTF!?
I get the feeling that people get annoyed with me for sending emails that are too long ("I can't read that much on my iphone" - gimme a break!). But I also feel like people don't have time to talk to me, so I send emails because that seems more efficient, especially when several people need to get the information simultaneously. I try to make them as streamlined as possible, with bullet points or numbered lists. Sometimes they get answered well and it's awesome, but plenty of times I get some kind of confusing bullshit. And then people complain when they feel left "out of the loop". I've also noticed that other people send the biggest piles of steaming nonsense in their emails to me, so I guess they do think I'm overdoing it. But when I can't even figure out what the point of your message is, as though you are continuing an in-person conversation that I didn't hear, I think you're doing the shitty job, not me.
End of rant, thank you.
P.S. Comments telling me that senior people get so many emails that they might just die if they have to reply to my (solicited) message are not welcome.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Want
For this month's Scientiae carnival, Karina asks what sorts of supplies we crave for back to school. I'm not much of a school supplies kind of person. I don't need highlighters and special pens and fancy scissors and tape dispensers. I have some of those things on my desk as I need them, but when I think of back to school shopping I think of clothes.
When I was a kid, I always got new clothes at the start of the new school year. My family never had much money, so new things mostly came at birthdays, Christmas, and back to school time. My mom would take me out, sometimes via the city bus to the downtown shopping area (so exciting!), and I would always want to accumulate as many bags as possible (how un-eco!). Even now when the weather cools, I fantasize about new jeans and sweaters. I try to restrain myself these days, due both to my budget and my ideals, but I do indulge a little.
On another supplies-related note, I'm finding my new lab is missing so many basic things! They aren't basic to my new PI, of course, as the lab is outfitted quite nicely for the kind of lab that it is as far as I can tell. But I keep coming up empty handed when I open drawers looking for the things I expect to be in a lab. Fortunately, a new PI just joined our department and will be pooling resources somewhat with our lab. This new person might do some things in my old discipline, so I might get to recommend some items for the start up. Methinks this is a good opportunity to get some of the things I need while forging collaboration with the new person.
When I was a kid, I always got new clothes at the start of the new school year. My family never had much money, so new things mostly came at birthdays, Christmas, and back to school time. My mom would take me out, sometimes via the city bus to the downtown shopping area (so exciting!), and I would always want to accumulate as many bags as possible (how un-eco!). Even now when the weather cools, I fantasize about new jeans and sweaters. I try to restrain myself these days, due both to my budget and my ideals, but I do indulge a little.
On another supplies-related note, I'm finding my new lab is missing so many basic things! They aren't basic to my new PI, of course, as the lab is outfitted quite nicely for the kind of lab that it is as far as I can tell. But I keep coming up empty handed when I open drawers looking for the things I expect to be in a lab. Fortunately, a new PI just joined our department and will be pooling resources somewhat with our lab. This new person might do some things in my old discipline, so I might get to recommend some items for the start up. Methinks this is a good opportunity to get some of the things I need while forging collaboration with the new person.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Anticipation
I'm going to a conference soon. It will be my first time attending a major meeting without presenting anything, and my first meeting in my new field. I'm super excited.
There is a reasonably large group from my institution going to this conference, so I feel like I'll have lots of opportunities to tag along and get introduced to new people without following one person around like a puppy. Also, there are a number of familiar names in the program (others like me that cross this particular disciplinary boundary) so I think I'll have a place to start with networking. The session are quite varied, so I think that there will be slugs of people going to the same sessions on similar topics together. Or not, if the meeting is really huge. I'm not sure what to expect.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to expanding my network, getting to know the people at my institution better, and most of all, learning a shit-ton from the talks. I've always learned easiest by listening, so I think I'm going to come away having made significant personal progress.
There is a reasonably large group from my institution going to this conference, so I feel like I'll have lots of opportunities to tag along and get introduced to new people without following one person around like a puppy. Also, there are a number of familiar names in the program (others like me that cross this particular disciplinary boundary) so I think I'll have a place to start with networking. The session are quite varied, so I think that there will be slugs of people going to the same sessions on similar topics together. Or not, if the meeting is really huge. I'm not sure what to expect.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to expanding my network, getting to know the people at my institution better, and most of all, learning a shit-ton from the talks. I've always learned easiest by listening, so I think I'm going to come away having made significant personal progress.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
On organizing a meeting
I'm organizing a small conference. Sweet Jesus is it a lot of work. And anxiety.
One of my first tasks when I started my postdoc was to organize this thing. What an intimidating, enticing challenge.
In addition to managing all the logistical decisions (what space will we use? what is the budget? how much will the registration fee be? will we have a poster session? how will we solicit and review abstracts? how will we determine the invited:contributed speaker ratio? how long will the talks be? and on and on), I had to develop the themes for each session and the meeting overall, invite the invited speakers, solicit industry sponsors, and write proposals for funding. It's weird and hard to assemble the right mix of speakers in a field that you have only just entered. Oh, and trying to stick to my principles and make sure there is good representation by women when I don't know enough players in the field to suggest any. Boo!
Of course I'm not doing this totally on my own. I've had lots of input from my colleagues, and critically, other people have laid the groundwork for invited speakers, or funding, or lent clout to my emails with their names in the cc line. Still, on the whole, I've been the lead on this thing. My influence has probably shifted the focus toward my old field a little bit, so I'm curious to see how that will play out in the quality and cohesion of the program.
In sum, I wish I hadn't had to spend so much of my precious postdoc time on a service task, but I'm glad to have tried something new and to gain so much visibility in this new field.
One of my first tasks when I started my postdoc was to organize this thing. What an intimidating, enticing challenge.
In addition to managing all the logistical decisions (what space will we use? what is the budget? how much will the registration fee be? will we have a poster session? how will we solicit and review abstracts? how will we determine the invited:contributed speaker ratio? how long will the talks be? and on and on), I had to develop the themes for each session and the meeting overall, invite the invited speakers, solicit industry sponsors, and write proposals for funding. It's weird and hard to assemble the right mix of speakers in a field that you have only just entered. Oh, and trying to stick to my principles and make sure there is good representation by women when I don't know enough players in the field to suggest any. Boo!
Of course I'm not doing this totally on my own. I've had lots of input from my colleagues, and critically, other people have laid the groundwork for invited speakers, or funding, or lent clout to my emails with their names in the cc line. Still, on the whole, I've been the lead on this thing. My influence has probably shifted the focus toward my old field a little bit, so I'm curious to see how that will play out in the quality and cohesion of the program.
In sum, I wish I hadn't had to spend so much of my precious postdoc time on a service task, but I'm glad to have tried something new and to gain so much visibility in this new field.
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